outrageous!

my son is three going on twelve. sometimes, he just utters this very outrageous phrases that he makes me laugh out loud, literally. here are a few examples:

baby: i'm scared of mama, papa and ate. i'm scared of those children.

*******

we just got to the store and the baby wants to get out of the car already
baby: let's get out of here before we die.

*******

baby: i'm thirsty
me: you call ate and tell her you want water
baby: i'm serious!
me: who said you aren't, call ate!

*******

i took him to the mall yesterday and it was late so i wanted to go already
me: let's go now babe. you haven't eaten yet.
baby: i don't want to eat. don't worry mommy, we'll just stay here.

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the baby and his cousin were playing in my room. they were so boisterous that i wanted them to go out. i threatened his cousin that i would take him home.
me: k, do you want to go home?
baby: no mommy, k is mine friend.