missing you

i haven't been spending much time with the bf these past few days. earlier, he was preoccupied because he needed money for the checks he issued. he had to do some preparations for clients that were coming in during the week. by wednesday, he had to drive television crews to the earthquake stricken areas. up to now, he is still on duty. he is doing it becasuse he actually wants to and partly because there are no more available drivers. i hate it! i'm not used to spending much time away from him, especially on out of town trips. i am supposed to be with him during this time. hahaha! i sound like a petulant high school student. but really, i hate the feeling.

anyway, yesterday i drove 183 kilometers just to spend time with him. imagine that! and i went there alone. that took me fours hours of driving back and forth. the first hour going there was easy, the second hour, i was feeling tired. on the way home, i was exhausted. as luck would have it, it rained when i was about 35 kilometers from home. i hate driving in the rain and i hate driving at night. but i had no choice. ahh.. the things you do for love.

when i got there, i saw different types of people. there were rescue groups, various television crews, locals, MMDA personnel and tourists taking pictures. i belong to the latter because i didn't do anything useful. = )

i was supposed to stay only for on hour but the bf had to leave and get food from the hotel restaurant that provided for their meals. i decided on a whim to join him. big mistake because it took us two hours to get back. i ended up leaving for home at about 7.30 already and two hours on the road meant i'd be home by 9.30. unfortunately, the rain made me go even slower and i got home at around 9.50pm. i was so tired by then and i still had work to finish. but i was really so sleepy so i stopped working and slept instead. i ended up waking early this morning to finish my tasks.

now the bf is back to the location again and i haven't even seem him yet. i doubt i'll be seeing him tomorrow as well. hopefully the contract will finished tomorrow or monday. if not, it will be a lonely valentine's day for me this year.

**the pictures show the bridge that got badly damaged by the earthquake. it's actually quite a steep drop and you need to use makeshift ladders to cross. the bf stays here the whole day and night until news broadcast is over. luckily (or unluckily), business is slow so he has the time to do this.
the pictures of two feet are ours. our sanuk sandals were bought at the same time but his has faded already. he says mine still look like new. the bf wears a jade ring for luck in business. that ring is huge!

just loving

image by www.pianoze.wordpress.com

if you have been in a relationship, you'll find it has it its ebbs and flows. you find yourself very much in love with your boyfriend/partner/spouse and sometimes, you feel tired just looking at him.

i'm reading this book, The Pilot's Wife by Anita Shreve. i haven't finished it yet but i'm halfway there. it's a good book, it was part of oprah's book club. it's an old book (published in 1999, i think) but because i buy only bargain books, it took me this long to read it. it only cost me Php40 from the neighborhood surplus shop where i get my books.

anyway, in the book, there's a part where Kathryn says she and her husband got past the "in love" state and were "just loving". i got that. i got her point that at some point your relationship will wane and fade in time. other people's in love stage may last for a month, half a year, a year or longer but eventually it will. i was reading this while i was travelling with the bf and i could totally relate. i guess we are now at the point of just loving. but it's okay. i am quite content with the relationship we have because it still has its moments. maybe because we spend too much time together that somehow everything becomes common, ordinary and routine. but i am proud to say that we do have exciting times still. the bf can be very sweet when he's in the mood and he does know what to say to make your heart melt.

i actually asked the bf what we were doing on valentine's day and he said the usual. the bf isn't big on valentines. he thinks its enough that he gives me expensive flowers. hahaha! but then again, valentine's really is just an ordinary day. he's more looking forward to our anniversary next month than this month's event. whatever!

so even if the bf and i are already at the just loving stage. that i sometimes wish i was doing something else instead of being with him. i would rather hang out with my friends than him. when he is thinking of business stuff even if we're together etc. we are happy. i don't know how long we will keep on just loving though...