thursday night

After so long, I finally went on a night out. It was something unplanned but turned out to be one of the best nights ever.

Last Sunday, I chanced upon my ex-bf's nephew, E, at the supermarket. We have always been great friends ever since I was in a relationship with his uncle. Even after we broke up, we maintained our friendship. He was back in town for a quick vacation for work and we agreed to meet up later. I was still going to the wake of my friend's father and then we would go out afterwards. My folks just dropped me at the funeral parlor. I called up my brother to fetch so I could get my own wheels before going out. When I got home, the baby was sick with fever. He was so hot so I gave him medication and decided not to go out anymore. I texted E and asked for a rain check.

He had told me he was leaving on the 30th but before that date, I totally forgot to set up another outing. By 7.30 pm on Thursday, he called me up. He was inviting me to join him, his brother and his girlfriend and the ex-bf. I wasn't too keen on going out but he told me he was taking the 10pm boat. I agreed to follow them because I realized I wouldn't be out long anway.

It was awkward seeing the ex-bf but fine, I guess. He always wanted to remain friends with me but I didn't want anything to do with him anymore. He was there for about an hour only because his wife (yes, he's married already!) didn't want him to go apparently. She did go to the resto and saw me there. By that time also, he was gone so she just left.

We stayed there until midnight and it was the first time I drank since last October of last year. I have been living quite healthily this year but I also didn't want to be such a killjoy. Anyway we were only drinking light beer. I had such fun laughing and talking and drinking with the group. Their uncle and aunt swung by as well so it was nice. They always liked me from way back when because they thought I was nice and well-mannered. E often tells the ex-bf if you had to marry you should have married C (meaning me). I jokingly retorted I am so glad he didn't. To be honest, I have no regrets breaking up with him. He was not "the one" I was looking for and will never ever be.

I'm glad I went out last Thursday even if I only slept for five hours because I had to go biking in the morning. I didn't let the bf know I was going out so I had no excuse. What I did was to pop a multivitamin before I left to exercise in the morning and it helped. Hanging out with friends is always good for the soul.

anytime

I wake up at 5:30 every morning because we exercise early. The bf and I go biking for about 21 kilometers daily (I need to edit my previous post). I know this because my bike has an odometer/speedometer and it measures the distance I go.

Waking up this early can be difficult especially for someone like me who loves to sleep. My body is aching when I awake and I would much rather continue sleeping. I also cannot wake up without an alarm clock. There was one time I forget to set the alarm, I ended up starting really late.

But when I am already on my way, I take the time to pray. Yes, I pray while biking and I am able to say my thanks to the Lord for the wonderful day ahead of me. I cannot pray when I wake up because my mind is still disoriented. But when I feel the cold wind blowing, I am happy to be alive and then I pray. I also pray anytime during the day, when I am not doing anything or when something is bothering me.

There are so many things that I wish that I had but I have way more blessings. God takes care of me, my baby, my family and friends. The fact that we are all healthy and at peace every day is enough. Whatever problems that come my way are welcome because they will always have a solution. I am glad I have a strong faith because this means I can accept anything that comes my way. Life is difficult but God will always make it easier. More importantly, He never fails.

thanks Paulo Coelho

you're not chismosa

I mentioned going to the Wednesday market this morning. It is about 20 kilometers from the city and we got there in time for lunch. We alternate between two food stalls and they probably recognize the bf and I because we've been going there for years.

After eating, the bf went to get lechon to take home. I was waiting for him in the stall and the owner talked to me. Here's our conversation-I'll translate it in English for easy comprehension.

Her: You've been coming here long and you still don't have kids.
Me: Oh we do, we have one child but he's still young.
Her: Really, I didn't see you get pregnant.
Me: I already gave birth when we started coming here.
Her: I see...

I guess she was wondering why it was only the bf and I that go to the market. The reason is there is no point bringing the baby because he won't eat any of the food they serve anyway.

sorry

I'm sorry for not posting anything these past few days. It's been a long three days for me because I've been swamped with work. I haven't done else these days.

• The baby's birthday is coming up in a couple of weeks or so and I haven't ordered any cake, balloons or anything at all. I intend to do it next Saturday when I won't have to work.
• The baby is sick with fever and cough. I am planning to take him to his pediatrician tomorrow because I think I've waited too long.
• I've been biking for 17 days straight. The bf does not believe in "days off" so we bike even on weekends. In the weeks past, we had a day off once a week but not anymore.
  
• Hormones have made me crave for chicken salad and ice box cake. I also love eating Cheese Rings these days.
• The baby already knows how to use Youtube and he spends hours on my computer watching a lot of videos.
• The bf and I finally got to go out of town this morning for the "Wednesday market" where we had lechon, tinola and kinilaw na isda. Yummy!
  

birthday, pee and rude

Me: Babe, it's C's birthday today. She's 6 years old. (C is my female mini pinscher) Let's sing Happy Birthday.
Baby: It's C's birthday? Where's her party?

**nice question!**
_____________________________


We're in the car, on the way home from church.

Me: I really need to pee.
Baby: Me too.
Me: You're wearing diaper.
Baby: Oh.

______________________________


We're walking to the store.

Baby: Mommy, who's that? (pointing to a house where the owner is visible sitting in her wheelchair)
Me: Don't point baby. It's rude.
Baby: It's a rude house?


______________________________

things to do

I don't have anything planned tomorrow but here's my list so far:

- go to church
- put on hair treatment and exfoliate
- watch downloaded movies
- eat puto and tsokolate for breakfast
- eat paklay (it's a local beef dish that I haven't eaten in a long time that my mom's going to cook tomorrow)
- withdraw salary from ATM
- sleep
- get a body massage
- buy baby's supplies for the week i.e. Oreo, cookies, milk, diaper, etc.

I don't know if I'll do this all but I do know I can definitely fulfill the eating part.

loss and death

I never liked people dying. Who does, right? Dying is inevitable and everybody will have to die eventually. Still, that does not make the whole ordeal easy. What I hate about dying is the fact that the person is gone forever. You'll never be able to see the person, touch, hug or kiss him. Even if they remain in your thoughts, they are still gone.

Last Saturday, I was watching the weekend news and saw the breaking report about Sec. Robredo's plane going down. I knew right there and then that he was dead. It was a logical conclusion considering it was a plane that crashed in the water. The probability of him being alive was very slim. My suspicions were confirmed when his remains were found. That news made me sad because I always liked him. We weren't friends but when I saw him on TV, he was very nice. He was very intelligent and always had a happy countenance.

I really hate how people who are good die young. They could have done even greater things but death took that away. Not only will their family miss them but all the people whose lives they touched. I know everyone will get over the loss eventually. But for now, I am one with all those who are grieving for his passing.

minute to win it

I watch the game show "Minute to Win It". I don't really catch it every night but I've seen it enough to leave a lasting effect on the baby.

Now, everytime he does something, he follows the host's lines. Whether he is going to run outside, play with his toys or turn on the air conditioning, he says the following:

"You got a minute to win it. Good wuck. The game begins in three, two, one. Eeeeng."

At the start, it used to be funny. Now it's getting old. Hehe... Bad mommy!

last meal

I saw The Expendables 2 last night and it was such fun. Anyway, in the movie, they were asked what their last meals would be if they had to choose. That got me to thinking what my last meal would be. I don't really have sophisticated tastes and when forced to answer, I'd probably say lechon skin and dinuguan. I am a sucker for lechon skin. I barely eat the meat and only eat the ribs if it is absolutely delicious. I choose dinuguan or pork blood stew especially if my grandfather cooks it. It's his specialty.

On second thought, I could probably included baked ziti, chocolate gelato and corn muffins in my list as well. What about you? What would you eat on your last meal?

say sorry

The bf's brother arrived yesterday from the metropolis. His brother asked him to fetch him from the airport and so he did. His brother had no checked in luggage so he was able to get in the truck right away. Our airport here is small. The arrival area has very limited space and parking is at a minimum. As they were preparing to leave, the policeman signaled the bf to go ahead. He couldn't proceed yet because a mother and son tandem was crossing in front of his vehicle. The bf waited until the boy had moved to the side before going. He was surprised to have hit something in front of him. The truck actually lurched and he was scared for a teeny bit. When he opened his windows, he saw that he had hit the boy's trolley. The mom and the bf exchanged words and he was asked to move to the side. The bf being himself, didn't stop but went on ahead.

This morning, he was called to the police station because the mom apparently filed a complaint. The bf went alone and they settled the matter amicably. The complainant didn't expect to be remunerated for the trolley but only wanted an apology. from him The bf willingly gave it to her and it was over in just a few minutes. Oooopps!

don't like

Are there people you don't like just because? I do. I have several on my list actually. By the way, these are local showbiz celebrities I just can't stand. What brought about this post is seeing Piolo Pascual on TV. You know the ad about Sunshorts. I may be a client of Sun Life but I just don't want to see Piolo asking me to watch those movies. I deliberately did not watch those because of him. Crazy right?

I don't know why I don't like, him prolly because he's gay. Hahaha! I do not discriminate against gays but I hate his hypocrisy. Everybody knows he's not heterosexual (anymore, because he has a son!) so why does he think he can fool us? Other people included in my list are Angel Locsin, Pia Guanio, Toni Gonzaga, Richard Guttierez, among others. I don't have a valid reason for not liking them other than the fact that I just don't. So sue me!

broken hearted Andrea

The bf and I live in different places. I live in the city while he's in the next municipality. But the distance is not great, just a couple of kilometers or so. Him going to my place or vice versa does not take ten minutes. Basically, I live in A and he lives in B and we bike to C, which is another municipality.

We bike daily for about one and a half hours. It takes me one hour to get to the C town plaza and it takes him about 50-55 minutes. Going back home is a breeze at only 30 minutes. When we reach the plaza, we take about 10 to 15 minutes to rest. It's our time to talk about the people we see, events of last night, etc. (Totally unrelated by the way, but I met the ex-bf this morning. He said hi and I ignored him!)

I always get to our pit stop first because the bf takes the longer route. Last week, I saw a piece of paper held in place by a rock. It was a letter addressed "to girls" written by a broken hearted girl named Andrea. I regret not taking a photo of the letter which was in Filipino. It wasn't correct in spelling or grammar but the pain was evident. It was the story of a girl who trusted a boy who ultimately broke her heart.

I found it silly and useless because everyone will have his or her heart broken hearted at one point or another. Maybe it was Andrea's first love and she viewed her lovelife with rose-colored glasses. But whatever! Life is bad enough as it is and having a broken heart should be the least of anyone's worries. We weren't the first to read the note as somebody had written on it saying it was crap. My sentiments exactly.

torrential

I have written that we hadn't had rain in about two weeks. That changed last night.

Last Thursday, we went to my aunt's house to celebrate my grandfather's 85th birthday. The party was for family only and was held outdoors. The night was stifling hot and we had a feeling it was going to rain. It didn't. Last night, I needed to get medication so I went to the pharmacy. Because I am lazy, I didn't bother to change and simply put on a jacket on top of my house clothes. I didn't bother using the car because I know I wasn't going to be out long. I just used the motorcycle. As I was driving, the air felt different. The wind was blowing steadily and there were no stars in the sky. I had the same feeling of rain. When I got home, I prepared for bed and was asleep by 10pm. I was awoken at 11pm to the sound of really strong downpour. It felt as if all the rain stored up in the clouds came down at one time. Combined with lightning and thunder, I felt as if it wasn't going to stop. But stop it did, after thirty minutes.

When I woke up this morning, there was still an indication of rain the night before but the sun was out. Up to now, the sun is shining brightly with no hint of dark skies. It's as if last night's rain was a fluke. I have no problem with rain as long as it falls in the night. Mind you, I don't want my exercise time disrupted.

uninspired

Do you ever have days when you don't feel like getting out of bed? You don't want to face the world and all you want to do is curl up and sleep? I have some of those days too. It's not because I am depressed, more like uninspired.

Today is one of those days. I just feel tired and lazy and I don't want to do anything. I am not looking forward to writing, surfing the web, reading a book or cooking. It's like all I want to do is not do anything at all. I know it's bad because, here I am quite healthy, with complete facilities and yet I am not being productive. There are so many people struggling with so many problems and disabilities yet they are all doing their best to get by. But I also have to accept that I cannot force myself. Instead, I say a prayer and hope that I will feel much better later in the day. Oh, I can be a real trouper and churn out ten articles hours before the deadline, spend time with my son and the bf and act as if nothing is wrong. I will also be in the company of my family later on and celebrate my grandfather's birthday. But at some point this feeling will resurface and I will have to deal with it again.

intense heat

The weather in our city has been quite hot. There hasn't been any rains in the last two weeks. It is nice to have the sun shining day by day, considering the really bad weather in the metropolis and the rest of Luzon.

I have experienced several headaches due to the heat but I will accept it rather than have wet weather. I am really saddened by the news of flooding, hunger and too much trash. Every day, the news channels are always featuring places submerged in water and people, especially kids, who are suffering.

I am hoping the weather will improve in the rest of the country soon and hope that the Filipino will learn from the lessons of nature. God bless us all!

fight

I don't always talk about the fights the bf and I have because there are hardly any. We don't fight like most couples because there is no reason to. But I was mad at him last Sunday and told him so. The bf and I had a huge fight last Monday. It sort of reminded me why we barely fight and that is because sometimes, fights can get dirty.

Of course, we made up just as easily. The bf is not one for grudges and he always tells me what he says in the heat of the moment may not necessarily be the truth. Still, some of the words we exchange can hurt. I am one to hold grudges and never forget but I have learned not to be that type of person anymore. Last night, I was still a little miffed but I got over it already.

The bf and I are now at peace and things are back to normal. I guess it's nice to have an argument every so often, if only to remind ourselves of what we mean to each other and what we have to do to stay together.

meal time

I made this carbonara pasta last week, I think (not to sure) I didn't mae this from scratch, which proved to be a bad idea. I used Del Monte's Carbonara sauce and it wasn't too creamy or yummy. I put in bacon and button mushrooms in it but still wasn't too good. I toasted a bit of garlic to add a bit of flavor.

One night, I felt like drinking Jollibee's Chocolate float but was too lazy to go and buy and it would be more expensive to have it delivered. I decided to make my own using Milo 3-in-1. I also added a scoop of chocolate ice cream in place of the vanilla ice cream. Yum yum!

This was my dinner last Thursday. Mushroom soup, cheesedog waffle and garden salad. Oh and don't forget my favorite dinner date: a paperback. I had a really nice meal. = )

bike pics

I am finally uploading pics of my new bike. How does it look compared to the junky old thing down below?

Great upgrade, right? And the new one provides a better ride too. The bf got us new bike seats too because the seat that came with the bike was really hard and gave such a sore front and behind. Trust me, the first ride was brutal!

cold, freeze and basura

Me: I have a cold, babe.
Baby: We have to get someping. We need a blanket Mommy, so you will not get cold.

(awww... mistunderstood much?)

****

Me: It's very cold in the bedroom babe.
Baby: Yes, we're freeze.
Me: It's not freeze, babe. We'll get frozen. Not freeze.
Baby: It's not frozen Mommy, it's freeze. Stop talking.

****

I'm watching TV Patrol

Me: Look babe, the place is so dirty.
Baby: It's the basura.
Me: Yes, there's plenty of trash.
Baby: It's the basura!

***

food for thought

image from facebook

me time

I'm comfortable in my own company and I'm happy to be alone. I constantly do that and I even go eat in restaurants by my lonesome. I am not bothered by it because there are time when I crave silence. Besides, I get to go where I want to and eat what I want without asking my companions whether they approve of the place or not.

I haven't done that in a while because life gets in the way. There are things to do, places to go to and there is not enough time for me. But I intend to change that tomorrow. I plan to go out and actually give myself the time that I crave and deserve. I won't go out at night but rather during the day, lunch to be more precise. I am looking forward to having a good meal and a good time all by myself. No distractions, just me with delicious food and a good book. Can't hardly wait!

cancelled

Last Monday, I was working on a task. It was a bit challenging for me but I was able to do it. It took me about three hours to finish the task. As I was proofreading what I wrote, I got a text from my boss saying the task was cancelled. I wanted to scream in frustration because it meant I had to work all over again. I wanted to insist on the task he assigned but I knew it wasn't possible.

I was so pi***d!!! I didn't work on the task he sent afterwards until it was evening. It took me another three hours to complete it. The next day, I didn't work. Hahahaha! Actually, it wasn't payback but rather because the bf and I had to go out of town.

I have learned my lesson well. Rather than work early, I have decided to begin working around 10 am. At least if I work late, I won't be finished right away. Whatever cancellations that may come will not be as painful because I haven't completed it yet.

excuses, excuses

It is safe to say that I am lazy. If I wasn't I'd have all the photos I'm supposed to upload in my computer, I'd be posting at least daily and I'd have a life! Hahaha! Unfortunately, I have done none of the above. My photos are still in the camera, I didn't post anything over the weekend and I am almost always in my bedroom.

I am not not exactly making any excuses for my behavior because this is what I am. Whenever I think of writing an exciting post, I tend to forget about it the next day. I don't really go anywhere so I can't blog about people or places I see. Instead of doing a post, I spend hours watching downloaded television shows or sleeping. I think of food I want to eat but end up eating what our help made because it's too much effort.

This probably part of the reason why I'm always broke because I'm not working hard enough. Hahaha! I make just enough and it's all gone in two days. I have plans of becoming a better person but I don't know where to begin. Being a lawyer is out because I no longer want to be a student. I am contemplating getting a real job, one that requires me to dress up and go to the office but I don't have the proper motivation yet.

Yes, I am lazy and making too many excuses. But forgive me for being human.

no other woman

No Other Woman was one of the hit movies of 2011 or 2012? I'm not really sure as I didn't watch it in the theater. The bf didn't want to watch it with me, nor did any of my family members express an interest. My girlfriends already saw it and truthfully, I wasn't too keen on watching.

Last Sunday, it was shown on Cinema One. (I seem to be a regular of this channel these days...) I saw it while flipping channels and decided to watch. Again, I missed about ten minutes of the beginning but I don't think I missed much. It was funny because Cristine Reyes looked so poor next to Anne Curtis. She spoke in Tagalog while Ann talked in English. Her clothes were dowdy and cheap. It was your typical wife-husband-mistress movie and there were no surprises at all. I didn't like how Derek got angry at Ann in the end, acting as if it was only her fault. But then again, that's how movies are.

All I can say is this: I'm glad I didn't spend a hundred bucks to watch this movie in the theater. It wasn't worth it, save for a few laughs.

concerns

- The baby hasn't been eating quite well these past few days. He has lost weight and only likes to eat Koko Krunch, Oreo and donuts. I am thinking of letting him drink Propan TLC again.

- I am broke yet again. This isn't new. Since the bf and I don't share finances, I am at a loss. Hopefully, things will turn around next month since it'll be the baby's birthday!

- I hurt myself last week when I fell off my bike! Hahaha! I didn't tell anyone but the baby what happened. The skin in my right knee was scraped off and it hurts like hell. It'll soon be healed but I still can't wear shorts. I've been wearing capris and jeans for a week already and I hate it!

- The bf has been having problems with the business and that affects me too. Sales are slow and have been for the past month. We haven't traveled in almost three weeks for that reason. Although he is still optimistic, he is already considering a shift in another industry.

relationship thoughts

The bf and I are always together every day. We start out with our daily exercise. During the past seven months we were running/walking, now we're back to biking. After that it's time for business. There are times when the day's schedule is frantic and we have so many things to do and so many places to go to during the day. There are also times when we have nothing to do. We can spend an entire afternoon just talking or sleeping or eating, depending on the mood.

We weren't this comfortable with each other at the start. What with our age difference and dissimilar interests, it is but natural. But that no longer holds true today. Despite our differences, we find common ground and interests. Now, we are content to sit in silence together. We don't have to always talk all the time. He also tries gives in to some of my quirks, understands when I am just in the mood for pasta even if he is craving for lomi and all that stuff.  We don't always do exciting things on normal days but we always make it a point to be together daily. We only take breaks on Sunday but that is only after our exercise.

He is thankful that I am very supportive of all his business ventures. I am the woman behind the successful man, as cliche it may sound. I do a lot of things behind the scenes and I am fine with that. Despite the moments when I feel that I should get married and I will have to end things with the bf, I don't think I can do it yet. I have devoted six years of my life with him and we already have a child. These are things that you can't let go of lightly and right now, I have no plans to do so. The only problem is that nothing ever happens to our liking. Whatever happens, there is always a reason so I try to keep an open mind and heart. I try to cherish every moment I spend with the bf and hope that whatever happens we'll get through it. Through thick and thin, sick and sin.

tuesday hole

Today is Tuesday and the weather's still bad. The rain still beats the sun hands down, although it shone bright during lunch time. I didn't like working early in the day and thus I started working only at 4 in the afternoon. I had to stop after half an hour because I needed to take my mom to the farmer's market. I was able to finish work by 7.30 in the evening, stopping only for dinner.

The bf and I still went biking this morning even if the rain would pour intermittently. It wasn't really pouring hard and it felt good to sweat a bit. We didn't go biking yesterday because the bf had to get lab work done early. The results were not too good as his uric acid and cholesterol levels shot up.

But what I find funny is the fact that I was wearing a shirt with a hole in the back. I like this ukay-ukay shirt I got for only 50 pesos. A lady comes by the house bringing stuff to sell and I bought this one because the cloth was cool and white. I wore it today and tucked it in my jeans as it was a bit lose. I had gone to the mall twice now knowing about it. My mom only mentioned it this afternoon so I said I'll put my hair down to cover it (although it was already too late, I think) Hahaha! The hole wasn't really that big but it was pretty obvious. Ooops!