giving friendship a rest

i have a circle of friends and we've been friends for about 15 years. that's quite a short time compared to the friends i've known for 25 years or more. but i would like to think i'm closest to my girls.

anyway, last year i had a silent feud with one of them. i think it's silly calling it a feud. i'm not mad at her, she is mad at me though. it's basically my fualt, when you think of it. but in my defense, it's about my personal life which i believe, is my choice. the thing is, they're the type of people who want to know every teeny, bitty detail of your life. and well, i try not to talk to much. they thrive on information, however trivial and mundane it may be. on the other hand, i am always out of the loop. news always comes to me last. not that it matters. i couldn't care less really. so that's usually where our differences lie. hence, the resting friendship.

i used to have a lunch buddy and we were talking once about a common friend of ours who had some personal thing going on. and he simply said this "i don't really care about that, she's my friend and that's all that matters". and i was like, i totally agree.

i never really go much into the lives of my friends. its theirs to deal with, i have my own. if they share details of their life, fine. if not, its fine with me as well. i mean, friends may be family we choose but it doesn't mean our lives should revolve around them. i'm not that heartless, actually. i will care about you, visit you when you are sick, be around special moments or occasions but i won't stifle or crowd you with my presence.

so i guess that's our problem. i keep myself at a distance, living my life as i choose to while they think how i live my life should be broadcast to the whole clique. oh well, time heals... in time everything will be okay, after taking a break, that is.